Is There Anything You’re Not Good At

Is There Anything You’re Not Good At

There are a lot of things I’m not good at… I just don’t do much of them! Two things I’m really terrible at are housework, mathematics! So I don’t do them in public 😉 And I don’t judge myself for that or try to be good at it.

The more time I spend trying to be good at something I’m not interested in, the less time I spend developing what I am good at.

I remember a story I heard years ago about how inappropriate it is to judge an animal by focusing on skills that the creature does not possess:

– A fish is specialized to swim so its ability to climb a tree (or fly) is ludicrous.

So where do we go with this? Is it wrong to expect people to learn something they are not naturally good at? To me, no. I think we all need a foundation of reading, writing, arithmetic, and sports… but at a foundational level, not a specialized level. It’s not about becoming expert in the basics, you just need to have them.

We all have heard stories about kids who were terrible at school but went on to become successful or famous or influential or wealthy. They didn’t get hung up on the things they weren’t good at. A good foundation is all about fundamental skills. But these are not the things to become expert in! You then need to specialize in what you are naturally good at, talented in, passionate about.

Albert Einstein wrote, “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” The question I have for you at this point of our journey together is, “What is your genius?”

In 1974 an interview with the famous modern dancer and choreographer Martha Graham was published in which she credited a remark about the ubiquity of genius to a noted composer: 11

Edgar Varese, the composer, said, “Martha, everyone is born with genius, but some people only keep it for a few minutes.” That is the demand – to keep it!

Here’s more to read on this story if you’re curious:

https://quoteinvestigator.com/2013/04/06/fish-climb/

What Other People Think About Me Is None of My Business!

What Other People Think About Me Is None of My Business!

Believe it or not, this is something I often have to say to myself. All my life I’ve been pretty good (or bad!) at worrying what others think, or needing to be liked. Although interestingly enough, almost everything I’ve done has put me in positions of management or teaching or international levels of influence (as a co-founder of Parelli Natural Horsemanship). Talk about attracting what you most fear.

Here’s what I have learned, that is most important: TO ONLY CARE ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE WHO ARE IMPORTANT TO YOU THINK!

There are times I’ve endured horrible attacks from people who actually know very little about horses, or about me! …Or had fat and unhealthy people criticize my way of eating! …Or had negative and unsuccessful people give their opinion on my positive way of teaching…

There are opinions that matter, but there are a lot that don’t.

Same goes for who you listen to, who you hang around.

In the early 1990s, my husband and I were staying with a friend in LA. He was a multi-millionaire and was giving us business advice. Pat wanted to form a membership, a continuity club for people who were passionate about learning to be good with horses in the ethical way that we teach.

I will never forget the brutal attack that ensued from Harry. He made us feel so stupid and berated us for hours about how this could never work, was such a bad idea.

That night, Pat and I were laying in bed talking about it. We both felt devastated and could not believe our idea was really that stupid. As we talked, it occurred to me to consider the source of the advice. Who was Harry anyway?

As it turned out, Harry had inherited a multi-million dollar shoe repair business. Not because he was a son and heir, but because he was an amazingly loyal and hard-working employee. The owner actually willed the business to Harry rather than his own son, who he said was a lazy good-for-nothing.

Harry took ownership, but over the next 10 years whittled the business down to a fraction of what it was. Yes, he was still living well, but he had not started or grown a business, he had inherited one and reduced it from over 100 stores to three.

Listen with discerning ears. And only heed the opinIon and advice of people you respect, admire, and who have actually been successful in the things they’re advising you for!